Establishing a Self-Care Routine Isn’t As Hard As You Think
To practice self-care is to practice self-correction.
I mentioned in a previous article that I would elaborate upon each of the nine lessons learned in 2023. Here’s the first of those nine.
Another article covered why self-care isn’t just about you. This article addresses why inadequate self-care contributes to that raging internal fire that I alluded to—that fireball of stress, anxiety, overwhelm, and imposter syndrome (to name a few) that can be not only unproductive but paralyzing.
But first, let's address the common complaint.
But I Don’t Have Time for Self-Care!
Yes, you do. Everybody has the same amount of time, just different priorities. I was in a practicum for a program I’m in and the discussion was about self-care. Many of the students admitted to not having a self-care routine, citing all the reasons why they don't have time or how they don’t have the energy or motivation.
I was on the opposite end of that spectrum. My take is that I can't show up my best self if I don't take care of myself first. This isn't a selfish view—quite the opposite. My thinking is that if I'm not my best self, then I can't give you 100%. Bottom line: if I feel like crap, then I'm going to perform like crap, and that’s not fair to you.
After I shared my self-care routine with the class, one student snickered, “Try doing that with kids.” I said, “Yeah, I do—with a three and a 12-year-old.” In fact, I maintained a self-care routine when working independently and just after my daughter was born. There were sleepless nights, but that's no excuse not to take care of yourself.
My point is this. You don’t wait to get the energy to work out; you work out so you have energy. And if you don't have the motivation, that’s okay. Fake it. Our BUD/S instructors used to tell us that false motivation is better than no motivation. They were right. Once you start generating momentum, you’re well on your way.
Find an excuse TO exercise, not an excuse to avoid it.
Why Do I Need a Self-Care Routine?
I won't repeat the importance of self-care, as plenty of articles out there regurgitate the same reasons why self-care matters. But I will share my take on why self-care is essential.
Self-care means dedicating time to the things that help you live well.
When you practice self-care, you’re practicing self-correction. You’re giving the mind and body a disciplined protocol to express and experience your true self. Your protocol—whatever that is—gathers up all of you (i.e., your thought patterns and cycles, mental and emotional reactions) to align toward your purpose, values, and goals and drive away the negative habits and underlying desires feeding those habits that have tried to pull you away from your higher self.
Put it this way: if you attune all your physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual rhythms to each other daily, then exactly zero parts of you will be out of alignment.
The beauty of an early morning practice is that it sucks. It sucks waking up early. It sucks getting out of that comfy cozy bed. But it also sucks feeling like you have untapped potential, like you could’ve gotten up, but you chose not to. By getting up early, you leverage the habit of doing the hard thing to anchor your consciousness against negative thoughts and habits. In other words, overcoming hard things creates the habit of overcoming hard things, which you then use to filter out negative thoughts and eliminate bad habits when they surface in the future. You’re cultivating the root of self-discipline and mental filtering.